Packing for portland A.

 Hemp shirt from REI.

Carhardt pants. A flannel. The glasses I see out of best.

Chaos of packing, I do it all in small chunks for days on top of packing for the move. What I’ll need to live while in boxes. What I’ll need to live for two weeks in a suitcase for our trip to Portland.

Utilitarian. I need time because airplanes freak me out. All the people. Gotta get in a zone to be there.

Two introverts traveling. It’s been one year with Christine.

I don’t want to say but I never had an anniversary trip. It’s wonderful.

For 10 days! Even!

Oh how I had to hint and beg to go anywhere. I used to really lay it on thick with Chris.

There was always a reason in my past life why I couldn’t do things for other peoples benefit.

Oh okay I will sacrifice I will sit and read and die of boredom.

No more. In just a few hours we’re flying to Oregon.

Last night I had sweet memories of ray at that house on Arminta. I bought it for his early childhood.

He stretched out and grew there. I walked him to school every morning holding his hand. Kindergarten through fourth grade. And now.

Moms moving to Pasadena and going on a trip.

Aunt sue “ are you crazy!!??” You can’t just go.

I’m going. Happy thanksgiving to me. Anniversary with cjristine the sweetness in life.

For us out of those backgrounds we grew out of.

Bye. 

With the backgrounds we’ve had she says how do I know how do you know how do we know what happiness and peace is?

It feels like I’m tired? Relaxed?

I ponder this. I don’t know but I’m making it in the moment. I am brave.

REI clothes don’t fail me. Uterus be kind this cycle. Glasses help me see. Let’s do it.